Keeping pregnancy quiet and appointments?

[adelaide]

I just found out a few weeks ago that I'm pregnant (woohoo!) and we're planning on keeping it between hubby and I until Christmas. Yesterday I had my first prenatal appointment. I only have one child in care and I managed to find someone to watch him for the last hour of the day before mom picked him up. I said to both that I had an appointment and didn't specify and they didn't ask. My problem is that today I got a call to schedule my first ultrasound for tomorrow! The place for ultrasounds isn't open past 5 (dck is picked up 5:05 most days) and now I have to find a sub for another "appointment". I'm just worried that dcm is going to catch on and I don't want her finding out before my family and before I have a chance to come up with a plan for when the baby comes. I don't want to ask the same sub in case she catches on too but my only other sub is my MIL who I REALLY don't want finding out and she is super snoopy. For anyone that kept their pregnancy quiet, how did you get around having a home child care and prenatal appointments? I have read that some people had their appointments during nap time which mine is supposed to be tomorrow but I'm not sure that actually solves my problem. It makes it easier for my sub to supervise but I still have to find someone available at that time and I'm pretty sure I should still inform my dcm that someone else will be watching her kid for an hour or so during the day. I thought about just not mentioning it to her since she wouldn't know otherwise but I wouldn't want her to somehow find out and I don't want to break her trust. Ugh, it just gets me stressed because I don't want to have to tell anyone out of desperation - I want to tell them when I'm ready and excited to tell them. Any help?

[kidlove]

I am NOT an advocate of lying however, IF you needed, could you say you have to do other things, such as run a specific errand that you can actually do within that time limit and get away with the visits being unknown. OR if you have to , you could say you have OTHER appt.s such as dental or annual. dont blame you for laying low for many reasons, I always kept quiet until I cleared the "first trimester" for safety. Not to mention the preasure parents may have on you would also be another reason to stay quiet for now. Good Luck and congratulations!!!

[Crayola kiddies]

Yes I agree with above poster .... You could say your tooth has been bugging you and called for an appt and they have one tomorrow. Good luck and congrats

[Mamma_Mia]

Congratulations!! Looks like we're due about the same time

My husband and I told our families already I just haven't told the daycare parents yet. Not until I have my plan in order so they don't "panic".

I agree with using another appointment like saying it's a dental and if it's a specialist appointment they are hard to re-schedule as the wait time is so long. So a quick "it's that time of the year to check it all out" shouldn't give much away.

[Momof4]

Congratulations on your pregnancy. People aren't stupid and will figure out that you are pregnant or suspect it and start wondering. The more honest you are with your clients the more they will respect you. It's understandable that you don't want to tell them for a few months but then you have to make a plan for them or you will lose them and they will start looking around for a new daycare. Good luck.

[mimi]

People will forgive any little white lies you tell in your first trimester as they will understand why you weren't truthful once they find out. Just don't build elaborate stories because then while people will be happy for your good news, they may just feel like fools for believing you and your credibility could come down a notch.

[Inspired by Reggio]

Congratulations on your newest addition!

I agree with just sticking to the 'less info as possible' about why/what the appointments are about and just do the 'just that time of year to be having some routine tests done ~ nothing to worry about' ~ chances are they will guess eventually but everyone knows why women keep a new pregnancy on the down low for at least the first 3 months and will forgive you not being open about that ~ but if you outright 'lied' during that time I agree with the other ladies that it will make people question their trust and start your 'happy news' out with a bad taste in their mouths.

[angelina]

Congratulations!

best of luck to you. like everyone said, you cannot keep it quite for long.

[adelaide]

Thanks for the congratulations and all the advice. I think I'm still going to keep it quiet, even if people start suspecting, but I will just keep it to vague explanations. I appreciate all your input!

[playfelt]

The fact that we are only a couple months till Christmas and you said you don't plan to tell family till then then that is your justification - sorry but you couldnt' risk ruining the surprise for family. With that said immediately back in January it needs to be one of the first things you do - even email the families after Christmas to tell them using the ok now that we have sprung the good news on our family we are ready to tell all of our other friends (note using the word friends might help make them take it easier). Then wait for the responses. a congratulatory email means a sigh of relief and no response means ok might have a problem or that they are away for the holidays. There is still plenty of time come January to tell the parents and for you all to start talking about your options.