Document on how to choose the right daycare provider

[busybee]

One other comment about self soothing. At this time I have 3 children 2 and under and my 4th starting next month.Out of the 3 i have now all are different.The 2 year old definitely self sooths and i admit it is nice .You change his bum lie him down give him his bottle and blanket he sleeps for a minimum of 2 hours .The next oldest is 1 1/1 and she definitely does not self sooth .She needs snuggles to go to sleep .My third is my youngest right now just turned 1 and he is learning to self sooth .However unlike the other he will only sleep maybe a hour and needs quite to do so. Its a challenge but i manage like this. The 2 year old goes down first as he needs the longest time and will sleep through world war 2 lol.Followed by about an hour later for the youngest ,then once he is down i have time to give the cuddlier her time.Sometimes its a juggling act but its a learning curve for care giver and child and eventually you know who needs what. Sure would be great if it was so easy as to just say OK nap time and they all went to sleep lol that's just not realistic IMO

[Niveah]

Thank you busy bee. It is nice to see that there are different philosophies among providers and I am so glad that parents can choose what suits their children best.
Routines are good and ofcourse babies can be trained to follow a routine. However, every child has different needs and until 18 months ( atleast 15 months) things cannot be very strict and fast.
For some kids morning nap can do wonders for the rest of the day.

A little bit of flexibility can be a big blessing!

[fruitloop]

Sure would be great if it was so easy as to just say OK nap time and they all went to sleep lol that's just not realistic IMO

It is that easy. I've never had to self sooth a child to sleep. I put all my kids to bed, tuck them in, tell them it's nap time and wish them a good sleep and close the door. They all go to sleep. I agree that with young children under 18 months you need to have a little flexibility. I give young ones a morning nap if they need it. To deprive a child of sleep that needs it is ridiculous. It makes for a miserable morning for everyone.

[playfelt]

Most children learn very quickly that the rules at home and daycare can be different and it is really interesting when I see the changes. Sometimes it is the parent either just assuming or doing things that make them feel better like taking a soother from their pocket and giving it to a 2 year old because they can't go without she says but as soon as mom is out the door out goes my hand and child gives me the soother and goes off happily to play. Mom went off comforted and that is fine but child shouldn't have to suffer for the day. For napping I put them down, talk briefly about it being sleepy time and leave them. For those that do cry I go back at intervals, assure them it is still naptime, lay them down and leave. It rarely takes more than a couple weeks for them to settle into the routine.

A lot of caregivers don't remember the days before the one year maternity leave but "way back then", lol, children came into care between 4-6 months depending on when mom started her mat leave. The children were just babies and therefore much more pliable and it was much easiesr to mold them into ideal daycare babies. Now we only get that if mom was willing for the last 6 months of her mat leave. All too often our role for the first couple months is undoing what was done for the past 6 months or doing what should have been done for the past 6 months but wasn't. Then the child fits into the childcare group really easily. It isn't that what the parent did was wrong so please no one jump on me for that all I am saying is that what works for a mom and baby such as rocking the child and even holding them while they sleep is just not part of daycare in a group setting. It is the child that suffers in the long run and the sooner parents come on board and reinforce some of the concepts at home the better for everyone.